TF2 Shipping


What is Shipping?

Shipping is the ancient and well practiced art of metaphorically smushing various characters' faces together like barbie dolls to make them kiss. It was invented when the ancient greeks listened to Homer waffle on about the Trojan War for the first time and upon hearing about Patrocles and his bbgirl Achilles they gave each other history's first recorded "Bombastic Side-Eyes" and retired to bed that night, minds already bursting with Warrior Cats-esque visions of the two fictional men doing the naughty. In a way, those were also the first fan edits, although they were imagined only. Luckily for us nowadays people, we have the means and ability to create these sorts of edits, but we sadly don't usually have the motivation.

...what was I talking about again? Oh yeah, TF2.


What is TF2?

TF2 is the best game ever created by anyone at any point in time ever, other than maybe Super Mario Chess. Not that VALVE care or anything. Those ratbastards have GOLD on their hands, yet all they ever do is ignore the outcry for updates and chuck a singular new game mode at us after three years to shut us up a bit. Unluckily for them, I am not placated. WHERE ARE OUR MEDIC AND HEAVY SPECIFIC DOMINATION LINES, YOU SKANKS? WHERE'S COMIC NUMBER SEVEN? WHY COULDN'T YOU GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER FOR FIVE SECONDS TO GIVE US A MOTHERFUCKING TV SERIES??

I just realised I was so caught up in my rage I didn't actually explain what TF2 is. If you don't know, google it. If you do, why are you reading this section? Look at the next part!


THE NEXT PART

The part you've alllll been waiting for: THE SHIP TABLE TM

Although it is as of typing this, still VERY barebones as I've literally only just started the CSS bit of my html tutorial. And I'm getting distracted by the allure of "creating new webpages"

SCOUT SOLLY PYRO DEMO HEAVY ENGIE MEDIC SNIPER SPY
SCOUT brat n brat batting helmet flashfire hopscotch mice n men texas twostep little prick speeding bullet what.
SOLLY batting helmet screamin eagles fireworks boots n bombs cold war helmet party rocket science american aviators freedom fries
PYRO Flashfire fireworks twin flames molotov cocktail toasted sandvich texas toast burn ward bushfire french toast
DEMO hopscotch boots n bombs molotov cocktail double dynamite vodka party short fuse jaegerbombs swordvan bomb voyage
HEAVY mice n men cold war toasted sandvich vodka party russian front heavy metal red oktoberfest vegemite sandvich russian roulette
ENGIE texas twostep helmet party texas toast short fuse heavy metal brokeback mountain science party outback steakhouse napoleon complex
MEDIC little prick rocket science burn ward jaegerbombs red oktoberfest science party dopplegangers urine sample gentle surgery
SNIPER speeding bullet american aviators bushfire swordvan vegemite sandvich outback steakhouse urine sample piss play knife fight
SPY ...ew freedom fries french toast bomb voyage russian roulette napoleon complex gentle surgery knife fight cloak and dagger

THE OTHER NEXT PART

aka shipping the other guys (gn) who exist in this universe

Another table? Yippee kai yay.

PAULING MERASMUS OTHERS MORE OTHERS YET MORE OTHERS MEDIC RIZZ??
SCOUT caught looking cosmic atomic Saxton Hale: battman
SOLLY launch codes doommates Zhanna: maggot bear
PYRO missfire crematorium N/A (rip)
DEMO buzzkill blind fate Medic's Wife: cheater's lament
HEAVY bloody sandvich come back stronger Cheavy: unstoppable force
ENGIE square dance magic of science N/A, unless you count Mimi Sentry. Which I don't.
MEDIC spectacle psychopaths healing magic Spy's Head: head over heals His Wife: wings of purity S-satan?: infernal medicine Cheavy: cold oktoberfest
SNIPER piss mauling rain of jarate Saxton Hale: blowing the sax Maggie: saxton's bane GLaDOS: SniDOS
SPY partners in crime snake charmer Ma: PORNOGRAPHY!
ADMINIST. business as usual cursed australium Sniper: australium smoke
OTHERS Zhanna: russian dolls Tom Jones: it's not unusual Maggie x Saxton Hale: saxmag
Bidwell: business casual Old Nick: skull party Bidwell x Saxton Hale: saxwell
Fried Chicken Girl: hits n misses Headless Horseman: bombinonmicon magic
Ma: plain awkward

A note of note: I am a firm (very firm) believer in Canonically Lesbian Pauling tm. However, I'm including her ships with the mercs for two reasons:

  1. Authenticity
  2. Yuri Aus (which is why her and Spy is in my faves: to me, they are yuri)

Like I said earlier, this webbed site is EXTREMELY barebones thus far. Don't get pissy pls. What you CAN get pissy over, however, is if I FORGOT your OTP. If I did that, BOTHER ME ON TUMBLR! My askbox is open. Probably. Also bother me if you know better ship names for saxmag, saxwell, bloody sandvich and cursed australium. I came up with three of those four and frankly they are s h i t e.